I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
