but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
