Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize
