..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Randomize
