You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Randomize
