everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
