i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Randomize
