is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
