I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
