I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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