her vagine was all disorganized.
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
