My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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