i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
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