so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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