I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
