Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Randomize
