I looked at my own cervix.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
Randomize
