So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Randomize