and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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