I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
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