Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize
