Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
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