she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
