so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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