Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
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