So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
