Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
