I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize