MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
They have beer where we have blood.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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