I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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