So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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