The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I wish you could order shots online.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize