just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
