she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I want to fling myself into the sun
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
Randomize
