Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
