ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
Randomize
