Me. At least after what I've been through.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
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