I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Randomize
