It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
