covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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