You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Randomize
