You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Randomize
