i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
