We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
