she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize