Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
