This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Randomize
