Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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