Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
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