I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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