I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
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