we should wear snuggies to the strip club
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Randomize
