I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
